The 10 Best Albums of 2000-2009
by Andy Alcala

The dawn of the 21st century didn’t give us monoliths orbiting Jupiter and sentient computers that kill astronauts, but it did give us a surprising amount of good music. The whole “information age” thing meant that word of good music was spread via computer and downloads, and forever made the idea of mix tapes obsolete. Meanwhile, the music industry took to the airwaves, creating “American Idol” and insuring that the world would be brainwashed into forever voting for whatever nubile pop star could wail the best. Hip Hop reached the lowest point of intelligence quite possibly seen in any genre of music, with producers sampling two or three notes on a keyboard while some kid rapped about how hot he was. Aging punk bands came out of the retirement home to try and recapture their glory days.

Even though all of this went on, the 00’s produced a great amount of music that was influenced and influential. With this knowledge, I have compiled the 10 best albums that have come out during this first decade of the 21st century. They are ranked by not only the quality of music they contain, but also how they reflected the spirit of this turbulent time.

With every list, there’s always contention, to which I answer, go make your own goddamn list. I will also take time to answer some questions that I think I will face.

Q: Why isn’t Radiohead on this list?
A: You mean the band that 99.9% of rock magazines worship? Sorry, I’m not a rock critic.

Q: Why isn’t Bjork on this list?
A: There’s no amount of money you can give me, no prostitute so hot that you can have me fuck that will make me say that Bjork has talent.

Q: There’s no reggae and rap albums on this list. Didn’t you say that people who hate this music may be racist?
A: Yep, and I still stand by that statement. Madlib, Cannibal Ox, and Ghostface Killah all put out great fucking albums, but there haven’t been any reggae nor rap albums that have stupefied me beyond belief from the 00’s yet.

Q: Why isn’t Nickleback on this list?
A: I don’t deal with comedy acts. Sorry.

Q: Green Day released the best album of the decade, American Idiot. Why isn’t that on the list?
A: I keep forgetting to buy guyliner and a tie. I’ll listen to that right after I’m done watching “Twilight.”

Anyway, here’s the list:

10) Spoon- Ga Ga Ga Ga Ga (2007) It sounds fun to be in the studio making a Spoon album. Some songs feature banging on a piano with crazy harmonics going on, and the bottom line is, Spoon are a band that seem like they can do whatever the fuck they want without getting in the way of making a great fucking album. This album has many great pop songs, some radio friendly, others not so much. To me, Spoon is like the Beatles if Paul McCartney wrote every song and was an insane maniac. I give this album extra points for having a Motown beat during “You Got Yr. Cherry Bomb,” and the album’s “hit,” “The Underdog” will burrow its way into your brain and lay larvae there that will hatch and live there until you die. During the 00’s, radio sucked hardcore, but surprisingly, it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. We have a long way to go before all people are listening to good music, however.

9) Sleater-Kinney-One Beat (2002) Preconceived notions about this band prevented me from enjoying then while they were still around. However, I have gotten over this, and learned to appreciate Sleater-Kinney for what they were: part of the next logical step for punk rock along with other bands like Fugazi and Unwound. Seeing as though one of the major fads in 00’s rock was to fire the bass player, I also nominate this band for the best without a bass. The best aspect of One Beat is how one minute the songs snarl at you and then they often surprise you with a melodious chorus. There’s also other pleasant surprises on here, like a horn section on “Step Aside.” The Clash title “Combat Rock” is rewritten as a harsh criticism of the patriotic war fervor that swept the United States after 9/11. If this band comes back to tour again, I will definitely go see them. Sleater-Kinney are not only an inspiration for many girls to form a band, but for anyone to write seemingly simple pop songs that attack pretension and feature a killer melody to boot. They certainly taught me that you can’t judge a band until you have actually listened to their music.

8) Grizzly Bear-Veckatimest (2009) I usually like to stay away from “hype” bands; or artists whose cause is taken up by various music critics. In a desperate attempt to be “cool” they will often push all kinds of crap on the unsuspecting public. How pleasantly surprised was I when the hype turned out to be true for this album. To me, Veckatimest is an album of contradictions: It’s pretty, yet abrasive; psychedelic, yet sober; and lush, yet sparse. It’s not an album that draws you in right away, and many of the tunes are not really that humable. Once you get into it, though, you have to listen to it from beginning to end to admire the unique harmonies and beautifully bizarre melodies. It seems like Grizzly Bear left in many obvious flaws, like a chattering choir; so that something new is discovered each time you listen to a song. I think Veckatimest qualifies as a “headphone” album, because songs like “Ready, Able” start out sparse and build up to a breathtaking climax that hits you like a wall of feathers. It’s kind of like if a band of 70’s folkies decided to make a prog rock album. And thank God, no drum machines or over gratuitous keyboards to bog everything down. If this is the beginning of the future of music, then I can’t wait for the next chapter.

7) Neil Young-Living With War/Living With War Raw. (2006) Neil said that this album should have been made by a younger band, and I agree. But it took an aging, ornery old rocker to say what was on the mind of many in the United States, while most bands in the music industry were worried about running out of ways to copy “Lust for Life.” This album could be taken more as a stab at the Bush Administration; it could also be taken as a middle finger to Neil’s middle aged audience who had seen political activism as a phase to grow out of. The music itself is totally stripped down, propelled by an electric guitar, bass, and drums. I have only one qualm about this album: the choir. 2/3’s of the time it just doesn’t work, turning an otherwise exiting affair into “rocking with the Mormon Tabernacle Choir.” Luckily, Neil released the “Raw” version of this album with the Choir removed. Anyway, “Let’s Impeach the President” is a great anthem, and will remain the best time capsule of why the Bush/Cheney years sucked. There’s everything on this album to make sure that Fox News calls you a traitor if you play it.

6) Sloan-Never Hear the End of It (2006) 30 songs on an album is something that is often found on hardcore albums (A fact that Sloan even seem to acknowledge on “HFXNSNC”). However, Sloan, in as many songs, has created a definitive history of power pop. All The influences are on display, from the Beatles (“Who Taught You to Live Like That?”) to Husker Du (“I’ve Gotta Try”) to Big Star (“Love is All Around”). I’m confident that this album will be regarded as a “lost classic” from the 00’s once people get tired of Kanye West and Bjork. Each song is not too long, nor too short, and many meld into each other in the best way, like Sloan has perfected on so many of their other albums. If a song needs to be only one minute, then it’s a minute. “Golden Eyes” is a prime example of a great song on this album that hits you and doesn’t overstay its welcome. “Can’t You Figure it Out?” would be a great song to make out to in 1974, but as with all things Sloan, it retains a timeless quality that stays through every decade. I think if you were to find any meaning behind this album, it’s that there will always be great pop that is found in many incarnations. But hey, I’m not a rock critic, so let’s just take the music as it is: great power pop.

5) Turbonegro-Scandanavian Leather. (2003) The 00’s were a decade of punk bands reuniting and shaking their wrinkled asses on the stage of the House of Blues, often to unfortunate results. Turbonegro put all critics of their reunion to shame with Scandinavian Leather, which is not only a great fucking album, but their best album. All the things that made Turbonegro legendary are on this album: homoerotic imagery, songs about anal sex, and tons of blood. The Turbos add a killer sense of melody to their deathpunk sound, bringing to mind classic rock like Thin Lizzy. I has the opportunity to see Turbonegro three times, and the San Diego Show at ‘Canes was the best. During “Drenched in Blood,” lead singer Hank von Helvette poured a cauldron of blood on the audience. Lead guitarist Euroboy walked on top of the audience while soloing. Several pillows were ripped apart, spreading feathers everywhere. There was also an awesome guitar-fellatio solo act which made the bouncers there really pissed. With a decade of poser-rawk bands like Jet and Wolfmother, it was good to know that the real deal was back. Whoa! I Got Erection!

4) Ted Leo and the Pharmacists-Hearts of Oak. (2003) If early Squeeze were on Dischord records, then they might have sounded like Ted Leo and the Pharmacists. This record pays tribute to early 80’s new wave (right down to a few reggae measures in select songs) but it keeps its eyes to a future where lead singers have an advanced vocabulary where even the most ardent listeners would require a thesaurus to figure out what the hell you were saying. This is one of those albums that I wasn’t too sure about when I first put it on, but it quickly built a catchy momentum until I frequently caught myself humming “Bridges, Squares” without any knowledge I was doing so. Taken all together though, this album is a gem. Ted Leo is by far the best lyricist in any band nowadays, light years ahead in lexicon and imagery, but he uses his power without pretension. There’s a tribute song to the Specials appropriately titled “Where Have all the Rude Boys Gone,” and features one of my favorite song titles of all time: “Tell Balgeary, Balgury is Dead.” Given Lookout! Records notorious penchant for annoying punk-pop, it was good that they released this album before they went bankrupt.

3) The Clientele-Suburban Light (2000) I’m kind of cheating here because this is actually a compilation of singles released in the 90’s, but goddamn it, it was compiled in 2000, and its pretty cohesive as an album too. Music writers try to be cool when describing this band, saying that they’re a mix of Galaxie 500 and the Zombies. Sure, I hear both of those bands in the Clientele, but the relatively low quality recordings of their early stuff propel their own sound. Most of my favorite records involve only three instruments, guitar, bass and drums, and Suburban Light is no exception to this. All of the songs on this album are a low key affair. They’re not songs to make out to, however. Rather, its great to listen to right before you go to bed; the vivid and often surreal imagery of everyday life that the lyrics portray compels me to reflect upon my day. “We Could Walk Together” is the best 60’s pop song that didn’t come out that decade. “Monday’s Rain” is a semi-heartbreaking song, perfect for walking through the city during a rainy night. “Bicycles,” paints a picture of riding through a part during autumn.

2) Super Furry Animals-Phantom Power (2003) It’s never been easy for me to describe the music of this band, as every album of theirs becomes a more eclectic affair. Phantom Power covers a wide variety of territory. There’s Surf’s Up era Beach Boys, psychadellic rock, country, electronica, and pop. All of this comes together to create SFA’s finest album. The theme of this album seems to be the tragedy of losing love to violent and dark forces. Even though this is a sad theme, I never get bummed when listening to this album, because it ends on “Slow Life,” a grim, yet determined anthem against the dark forces of greed and corruption. This album captures the feeling that many had around 2003 of hopelessness. Terrorists wanted to destroy the world and our elected officials had gone mad with power. “Liberty Belle” seems to be about the United States leading the world without a clear purpose itself, and “The Piccolo Snare” is a beautiful anti-war song of brotherhood. Even though this album is SFA’s best, in my opinion, it would be hard to say where one should start if they wanted to get into the Furries. Indeed, they’ve produced so much good music in the 00’s that it was hard to pick an album for this list, but Phantom Power is more than adequate.

1) The Exploding Hearts-Guitar Romantic. (2003) The 00’s were a decade of revivalism. First the “Garage Revival,” then a slew of bands began to emulate 70’s punk bands. All the bowl haircuts and tambourines couldn’t disguise the fact that these bands were simply content in emulating their heroes, rather than moving forward. I think that the Exploding Hearts were an exception to this rule. Guitar Romantic has one foot in the past and one in the future, resulting in an album that not only pays tribute to 70’s power pop, but surpasses many of its greatest moments, as well. The Exploding Hearts weren’t afraid to take the next step to make a song great, and add piano, keyboards, and xylophones only when they made a song absolutely great. You can hear echoes of a lot of great bands in these songs: The Clash, The Buzzcocks, The Supremes, and Phil Spector girl groups. But along with these older influences are brand new ideas that the band brings. They aren’t too punk to be jaded and have genuine feelings of love, rather than the manufactured “girl group” type, no matter how charming it is.

Some Honorable Mentions:

Catchiest Song: “Gyrru Gyrru Gyrru” by Gruff Rhys. A song about driving that’s perfect for driving.

Old Band that still was good during the 00’s: Sonic Youth. They released three of their best albums during the 00’s: Murray Street, Rather Ripped and The Eternal. They may no longer be youth, but they are still sonic!

Best Rap Album: Fishscale by Ghostface Killah: Great fucking soul samples, crazy rapping, and often fucking hilarious. The best album about cocaine ever made.

Band I was sorry to see break up: Fugazi. Most inspirational band ever.

Reformed punk band that still put on a good show: The Buzzcocks. Sounded like they did in the 70’s, only fatter and balder.

Best show: Turbonegro. See above.

Nicest musician: Peter Murphy. He signed my Bauhaus record and put us on the guest list for his LA show.

Gimmick band that put out a good album: The Dead Weather. I actually enjoyed Horehound.

Most hilarious headline: Shins keyboardist arrested for beating his girlfriend. With the way this band sounds, I’m surprised his girlfriend didn’t beat him up.

Worst song of the 00’s: (Three Way Tie) “Laffy Taffy” by D4L. “The Whisper Song” by the Ying Yang Twins, and “My Humps” by the Black Eyed Peas. The soundtrack to millions of teens getting pregnant across America.

Worst rappers: (tie) Lil’ Jon, and Mike Jones. Dumb and dumber, retarded and retardeder.

Worst rock band: Nickleback. I need to fly and American flag and eat a steak every time these guys are on the radio, and they’re Canadian.

Worst Rock Song: “Wake Me When September Ends” by Green Day. Melodramatic. I don’t understand because I don’t shop at Hot Topic.

Most Unwelcome Reunion: Phish. At least all the hippies are in one place so they can be easily exterminated.

Worst Show: Pere Ubu. Imagine if the guy from Blues Traveler was ornery and forgot all the lyrics.